Humor

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 6450
Credit: 9577106522
RAC: 7851497

RandyC wrote: Never attempt

RandyC wrote:

Never attempt to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.

Robert A. Heinlein 

That's terrible!  Especially if the Pig has a wonderful singing voice.....

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)  I want some more patience. RIGHT NOW!

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 6450
Credit: 9577106522
RAC: 7851497

IF MY GRUMBLING WIFE  WERE

IF MY GRUMBLING WIFE

 WERE STILL ALIVE

 I JUST MIGHT ENJOY TONIGHT'S MOON

ISSA 

 

From "Haiku Harvest"

 

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)  I want some more patience. RIGHT NOW!

Jinkei
Jinkei
Joined: 28 Aug 10
Posts: 348
Credit: 288416433
RAC: 330197

Thats sad and beautiful

Thats sad and beautiful

E pluribus unum

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 6450
Credit: 9577106522
RAC: 7851497

Did you hear about the

Did you hear about the procrastinator who stopped to think?

 

 

 

He hasn't moved since.

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)  I want some more patience. RIGHT NOW!

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 6450
Credit: 9577106522
RAC: 7851497

How are low blood pressure

How are low blood pressure and low water pressure alike?

 

 

 

 

 

When they happen they can make you feel dizzy?

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)  I want some more patience. RIGHT NOW!

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 6450
Credit: 9577106522
RAC: 7851497

It was a dark and stormy

It was a dark and stormy night.

Lightning struck.

A shot rang out.

It was 

THE END

 

 

 

This joke may be too meta to appeal. If you google the first line it may become funnier. 

 

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)  I want some more patience. RIGHT NOW!

Kavanagh
Kavanagh
Joined: 29 Oct 06
Posts: 1858
Credit: 103011329
RAC: 12122

As I watched the dog chasing

As I watched the dog chasing his tail, I thought dogs are easily amused...
Then I realised I was watching the dog chase his tail!

 

Richard

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 6450
Credit: 9577106522
RAC: 7851497

HA!!! An excellent

HA!!!

An excellent self-referential joke :)

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)  I want some more patience. RIGHT NOW!

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 6450
Credit: 9577106522
RAC: 7851497

Most people are not complete

Most people are not complete idiots.

 

 

 

After all, that would take an EFFORT!

 

 

Huh?

Yup.

First they would have to make a list of all the idiot points they needed to perform...

Second they would have to make a plan to hit all those idiot points....

Etc.

Like I said it would take too much work....

 

 

 

 

ROFLing...

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)  I want some more patience. RIGHT NOW!

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 6450
Credit: 9577106522
RAC: 7851497

What part of a watch supports

What part of a watch supports a Flower?

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Stem.

 

 

From "Riddles, Riddles, Riddles" by Joseph Leeming

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)  I want some more patience. RIGHT NOW!

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