Should you socialise with your colleagues outside work?

Chris S
Chris S
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Topic 203942

Well fellow Einsteinans what say you? This subject is paricularly topical at this time of year with office parties etc. I would tentatively proffer an opinion that it depends much upon which country you live in and the social standards adopted. The USA seems paticularly keen on team working as they call it. But look into it further and pople like Sharma are just out to retain staff, they don't really want to know them as a person.

Those of us around in business in the 70's can remember the traditional Xmas typing pool party, with shenanigans on and behind the photocopier.Then the firms dinner & dance where if you wanted to get on you chatted up the bosses wife. I've always felt that you don't mix business with pleasure, but that is just one view.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-38224684

Waiting for Godot & salvation :-)

Why do doctors have to practice?
You'd think they'd have got it right by now

Holmis
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I'd say that you should spend

I'd say that you should spend time with people you like and that hopefully like you too!
If that happens to be business colleagues then what's the harm? As long as people manage to separate what happens at work and what happens outside and don't treat friends at work any better or worse than other colleagues.

Mike Hewson
Mike Hewson
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The BBC story is really about

The BBC story is really about competitive alphas trying to sort out who is boss, then discovering co-op is the better way for them. Traditionally DownUnda we have had a pretty flat social landscape, class-less egalitarian etc, except maybe if money comes into play.

....  if you wanted to get on you chatted up the bosses wife ...

DownUnda interactions with co-workers, in or out of the workplace, is now so fertile with litigious opportunity* that only mere fools dare ( our law now allows offenses to be self defined ). As it can be quite profitable then varieties of baiting are on the rise ie. constructed complaints ( typically with corroboration from co-conspirators who later split the proceeds ) for the purpose of later presentation to some penalising forum for reward. But choose your victim cloth carefully. Alas the genuine complaints are being lost in the gold rush. So your social touch has to be so light as to be meaningless. Often at occasions you see pasted-on twitchy smiles ( like you'd see emanating from those standing next to a dictator ). Anyway that only really matters if either party can afford legal action or payout eg. my profession. No, I haven't been the subject of any fuss myself but I've seen the corpses ..... :-))

I tend to simply associate with those I know and trust on other grounds.

Cheers, Mike.

* There's a ripper of one going on right now, see here. It blew $100M off Channel Seven's share value in one day .... if not for the workplace connection then it would have been just another failed romance in the 'burbs.

( edit ) A chuckly subtext here is one of Australia's traditional ambulance-chasing news organisations complaining of prejudicial & inaccurate reporting when they are the topic of discussion ...... LOL! 

I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter ...

... and my other CPU is a Ryzen 5950X :-) Blaise Pascal

Chris S
Chris S
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There's a ripper of one going

There's a ripper of one going on right now, see here. It blew $100M off Channel Seven's share value in one day

Ah yes the traditional office romance. It's all OK on both sides until it ends acrimoniously which most do, then we have the fallout, with lost careers and broken marriages.  9 times out of 10 it isn't worth it. At company do's I always stayed for one drink to be seen to be sociable, then left. Wasn't interested in the social crawling.

There was one occasion I heard of where a new senior manager wanted to know the ins and outs of the company, so at the Xmas bash, his wife which nobody had met, arrived separately with the task of listening to all the chit chat which happens at these bashes.  All very underhand of course. But she got hit on heavily by a junior manager who wouldn't take no for an answer, and who had to be told rather firmly to back off by the Boss. The junior resigned on the Monday morning.

 

Waiting for Godot & salvation :-)

Why do doctors have to practice?
You'd think they'd have got it right by now

Mike Hewson
Mike Hewson
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Well, I didn't say there was

Well, I didn't say there was any shortage of 'mere fools' ..... :-))

Cheers, Mike.

I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter ...

... and my other CPU is a Ryzen 5950X :-) Blaise Pascal

Chris S
Chris S
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There is only one instance

There is only one instance where you can say it's a business doing pleasure with you :))

Normally it is best not to mix them.

 

 

 

Waiting for Godot & salvation :-)

Why do doctors have to practice?
You'd think they'd have got it right by now

Dr Bacon (Ship My Plants Department)
Dr Bacon (Ship ...
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Don't dip your wick at work

Don't dip your wick at work should be easy enough to remember.


Annie minion :)

 

 

Einstein@Home Verified Contributor (I think?) 

Winterknight
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Don't do it, says he from

Don't do it, says he from experience.

My first wife was somebody from work. What a mistake.

Mike Hewson
Mike Hewson
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The doctor/doctor,

The doctor/doctor, nurse/doctor and nurse/nurse combo almost never works. I think the initial attraction simply arises from being together alot of the time, as both jobs are exceptionally time greedy in early career, and so you don't get out and about much. But both are competitive fields ie. attract and sustain that style of person. That's not bad for the field, as it helps to get the best out of people which in turn gives improved results for the sick ones. 

But that doesn't work well for long term personal relationships which do best in a co-operative fashion ie. no-one has to be 'in charge' or 'win'. It takes some acquired wisdom to realise that competition is merely a tool relevant for some purposes and not an outcome of itself.

I married a bank teller and we are still together 32 years later. We met at high school ....

Cheers, Mike.

I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter ...

... and my other CPU is a Ryzen 5950X :-) Blaise Pascal

Gary Charpentier
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Then there is always the

Then there is always the exception.  Have a Dr. who is half of a Dr./Dr. H/W couple.  They share an office.  Different specialties though.  Haven't asked how many years of marriage but I know there are grand kids.

So as you say Mike it takes the right perspective on work vs. personal life.

 

Chris S
Chris S
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But there are Office romances

But there are Office romances that do work. My mum was a junior typist in the office where dad was the Manager. They were married from 1939 until her death in 2000, and got the 60th Greetings card from the Queen.

Waiting for Godot & salvation :-)

Why do doctors have to practice?
You'd think they'd have got it right by now

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