If you hate your job and they love theirs and you're all auditors - even if they're nice people - don't... because all they'll talk about is work, even whilst at it in a blancmange.
Please wait here. Further instructions could pile up at any time. Thank you.
Blank-Mange ? DownUnda we have Pavlova or Trifle ! :-)
In any event there are three types of auditors ( listed in order of increasing difficulty for the auditee ) :
- LT or LowTard. Basically punching well above their intellectual weight. Common as mud. These have the demeanor of little famous-european-right-wing-fascist-dictators-that-we-dont-mention-online-thesedays-especially-on-German-hosted-websites. They miss everything that technically matters because they have their eyes off the ball, they play the man, and are only looking for some schadenfraude. What matters for them is that they are in charge, outcomes irrelevant. They turn the process into punishment & irrespective of true guilt. Silly people might inadvertently blurt out a confession to them, maybe expecting mercy. LOL.
- HT or HighTard. Clever enough for sure, may seem polite, but hasn't the killer instinct. Too insecure. Mildly dangerous because, like Inspector Clouseau, they could accidentally solve a case.
- PTG or Poacher-Turned-Gamekeeper. These are fortunately quite rare. They've worked out they can make a good living with much less grief by going down the bright side of the street. They have a very high success rate and are correct to boot. But they once walked on the dark side and hence can think like a perp. If you are a perp then you're screwed. If you aren't then hope for no misunderstandings.
It's probably only mere luck, but to date I have never been audited for anything. As before, I've seen the charred corpses.
I have no primary knowledge on what any of them get up to within high quality desserts.
Cheers, Mike.
( edit ) You may well ask : what is the plural of auditor ? I'd like to propose : a bastardy of auditors. But that would be gauche of me ......
I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter ...
... and my other CPU is a Ryzen 5950X :-) Blaise Pascal
Ah, love the audit. Time to show how good your work is. And prove government employees are ...
Only unfriendly one got snowed. About a year before I convinced the boss that doing "A" wasn't the right way, so we went with "B". About a year later out of the blue, letter says auditor is coming, going to look at the last three years. Well they looked at the last quarter first, found one entry for a dollar or so and said you are basically doing it right, not worth my time to look any more. Next time on that dollar entry do it this way. Goodbye.
Most recent one (different job), Boss who is a know it all and used to be on the other side blurts out ... that cost a bunch of money and put notes in the file.
Most of the rest have been correspondence types. Those are easy. Just give them the info that the form doesn't have spaces for and they go away.
The ROYAL PITA is a compliance measurement audit. That one is show me everything and they mean everything! Even your knickers.
The ROYAL PITA is a compliance measurement audit. That one is show me everything and they mean everything! Even your knickers.
I say guys, decorum in the forum and all that. I wear mens briefs (no no not theirs, mine!) , do we allow cross dressers in here?
Anyway I wanna know where these famous office parties are with things going on in the blancmange. I think my education has been severely lacking, I really do people.
Waiting for Godot & salvation :-)
Why do doctors have to practice?
You'd think they'd have got it right by now
I converted a bad employee
)
I converted a bad employee into a wife.
She worked for me but was not suited to the job so I put her at a location where she would not slow down sales or impede others.
Once we started going out, she wouldn't work for me anymore.
It used to make me mad when I was short handed and she wouldn't help but I think she knew more than me.
I was focused on the near term and she had a less myopic outlook.
You talk in the past tense
)
You talk in the past tense?
Waiting for Godot & salvation :-)
Why do doctors have to practice?
You'd think they'd have got it right by now
If you hate your job and they
)
If you hate your job and they love theirs and you're all auditors - even if they're nice people - don't... because all they'll talk about is work, even whilst at it in a blancmange.
Please wait here. Further instructions could pile up at any time. Thank you.
I say girl steady on there,
)
I say girl steady on there, that never happened at my office Xmas parties. I obviously took up the wrong career ..... damn ....
Waiting for Godot & salvation :-)
Why do doctors have to practice?
You'd think they'd have got it right by now
Blank-Mange ? DownUnda we
)
Blank-Mange ? DownUnda we have Pavlova or Trifle ! :-)
In any event there are three types of auditors ( listed in order of increasing difficulty for the auditee ) :
- LT or LowTard. Basically punching well above their intellectual weight. Common as mud. These have the demeanor of little famous-european-right-wing-fascist-dictators-that-we-dont-mention-online-thesedays-especially-on-German-hosted-websites. They miss everything that technically matters because they have their eyes off the ball, they play the man, and are only looking for some schadenfraude. What matters for them is that they are in charge, outcomes irrelevant. They turn the process into punishment & irrespective of true guilt. Silly people might inadvertently blurt out a confession to them, maybe expecting mercy. LOL.
- HT or HighTard. Clever enough for sure, may seem polite, but hasn't the killer instinct. Too insecure. Mildly dangerous because, like Inspector Clouseau, they could accidentally solve a case.
- PTG or Poacher-Turned-Gamekeeper. These are fortunately quite rare. They've worked out they can make a good living with much less grief by going down the bright side of the street. They have a very high success rate and are correct to boot. But they once walked on the dark side and hence can think like a perp. If you are a perp then you're screwed. If you aren't then hope for no misunderstandings.
It's probably only mere luck, but to date I have never been audited for anything. As before, I've seen the charred corpses.
I have no primary knowledge on what any of them get up to within high quality desserts.
Cheers, Mike.
( edit ) You may well ask : what is the plural of auditor ? I'd like to propose : a bastardy of auditors. But that would be gauche of me ......
I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter ...
... and my other CPU is a Ryzen 5950X :-) Blaise Pascal
Ah, love the audit. Time to
)
Ah, love the audit. Time to show how good your work is. And prove government employees are ...
Only unfriendly one got snowed. About a year before I convinced the boss that doing "A" wasn't the right way, so we went with "B". About a year later out of the blue, letter says auditor is coming, going to look at the last three years. Well they looked at the last quarter first, found one entry for a dollar or so and said you are basically doing it right, not worth my time to look any more. Next time on that dollar entry do it this way. Goodbye.
Most recent one (different job), Boss who is a know it all and used to be on the other side blurts out ... that cost a bunch of money and put notes in the file.
Most of the rest have been correspondence types. Those are easy. Just give them the info that the form doesn't have spaces for and they go away.
The ROYAL PITA is a compliance measurement audit. That one is show me everything and they mean everything! Even your knickers.
The ROYAL PITA is a
)
I say guys, decorum in the forum and all that. I wear mens briefs (no no not theirs, mine!) , do we allow cross dressers in here?
Anyway I wanna know where these famous office parties are with things going on in the blancmange. I think my education has been severely lacking, I really do people.
Waiting for Godot & salvation :-)
Why do doctors have to practice?
You'd think they'd have got it right by now